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Written by Emily Cross.
13 minute read
Finding the words to pay your respects at a friend’s funeral may not always be easy, and this is completely understandable. At a time when so much of life may seem like it is out of your control, it’s being able to express yourself that, perhaps, matters more than ever.
Funeral poems for friends are one of the most moving ways to work through the sometimes complex feelings of grief. They are thoughtful, heartwarming, and poignant all at the same time, allowing you to express yourself on a deeper level than you otherwise might have been able to.
During the course of providing our direct cremation services, we have heard of some quite beautiful choices of funeral poems for friends who have died. In this guide, we want to share some of them with you in the hope that we may be able to provide a helpful starting point for your friend’s service.
Key takeaways:
If you were to take a look at some of the most popular grief poems for healing, you would find that there is a huge amount of variation in terms of style and tone, but also a common thread running through everything.
The ability of poetry to express grief, love, and cherished memories in just a few short lines is a testament to the careful thought and deep reflection that goes into every word. This makes them a popular choice with many who are seeking to honour friendship through heartfelt words so that they can continue to heal and process emotions.
The lasting sense of support and comfort that may be derived from a healing poem for a friend that is read aloud during a funeral ceremony is hard to put into words. Being able to sit with the verses and think about them on a deeper level could provide something to focus on that gives you the time and space you need to continue your personal healing journey.
It’s easy to assume that British funeral traditions—often understated and emotionally reserved—should guide your choice of poem for a friend. But while tradition can bring comfort, it’s not a rulebook. If your heart calls for something more personal or emotional, that’s perfectly okay. This is your chance to express your true feelings.
One of the beautiful things about poetry is the combination of imagery and symbolism that the words are able to create. For this reason, you may find that a verse that captures a shared memory helps you to creatively express the depth of your friendship.
The love you have for your friend could then combine with the humour you shared, the loyalty you had for one another, and the warm feeling that constant companionship may have provided. Taking a moment to reflect on how personal and sincere you feel each poem to be may help you learn more about what your friend meant to you.
Tone and emotional expression
There is no shortage of beautiful funeral poems that we could recommend, but the final choice is, of course, yours. If you feel you want to grieve in an emotional, reflective way, you may look for a poem that is more sombre and slower paced than most. Alternatively, if you prefer your reading to be a celebration of your friend’s life, looking for something that is more focused on uplifting, inspirational wording may be better suited.
Despite the depth of your friendship bond, you may also need to take a step back and consider the immediate family and next of kin. The way in which you mourn your friend may be something that you wish to align with the path the family chooses to take. That way, you may find that you remove the small chance of unintentionally causing upset on the day of the funeral.
We hope that by taking a closer look at some of the common funeral tribute examples we have compiled that we have been able to pull out the more poetic options. These are included in the following sections and may serve as helpful starting points when you are searching for words that feel right to you.
Poems chosen for scattering a friend’s ashes or reading at their funeral often carry a timeless quality, grounded in tradition. These verses offer a comforting sense of permanence and familiarity for everyone present. When you feel ready, here are a few meaningful suggestions to consider:
Finding words that you feel will resonate with grieving friends and family may feel like a big responsibility, but taking it on when the next of kin asks you is something to take great pride in. They are asking you because they trust your judgement and want to hear how you viewed their loved one.
The process of remembering a friend who has died is a very personal one, and that may mean that you prefer something more modern and contemporary. If you find you feel this way, you may wish to take a look at the following suggestions as a starting point:
As always, we want you to know that these are only suggestions for starting points; you, of course, have complete freedom regarding the direction you choose to take. Sitting with each of these suggestions, even for just a couple of minutes, may help you to clarify how you are feeling and begin to understand what your friend’s death means to you.
If you are creatively minded, or if you simply want to take the lead at this time, you may decide that you want to start writing a poem for your friend’s funeral. These types of heartfelt gestures are deeply moving for the immediate family and next of kin and serve to illustrate the true depth of your friendship. The difficult part, in many cases, may prove to be knowing where to start.
There may be some reading who could find something to start with by looking at grief and loss quotes that are frequently delivered at funerals. Others may find that a period of deep reflection while doing a mindful activity is a much more effective way to get things started.
If you would like to try expressing yourself through verse, here are a few suggestions that may help you get started a little more easily:
The key point here is that you are not chasing poetic perfection or literary acclaim. By writing words that feel sincere, simple, and authentic, you will be able to speak from the heart as the verses begin to take shape on the page.
Your reading may feel like it has the potential to help so many of the people in attendance work through some of the five stages of grief, so you inevitably end up putting pressure on yourself. In our experience, trying to maintain balance and reduce stress levels is often the most effective approach as the day of the service approaches:
Focusing on the comfort you are trying to provide may help you to see your reading less as a source of worry and more as a fitting tribute that honours your friend. You may also find that it helps to picture your friend standing beside you as if you were reading to them, and them alone.
Topics such as hope, healing, and the continuation of love may be able to lift both you and your fellow mourners at such a difficult time. Here are some popular poems that you may derive comfort from:
Although these verses have different styles, they each seek to gently soothe those listening while also acknowledging the grief they are experiencing. This is the reason poems of this sort are able to lift people up and provide solace during hard moments at the same time.
Some turn to the many books about death when looking for inspiration, while others visit platforms such as Eulogy Generator that specialise in heartfelt poems of just a few lines of verses that are spread across dozens of different poets and styles.
We want you to know that we are always here for you, from the emotional side of things to the practical issues you need to take care of. If the death of a friend has made you rethink your own legacy and what you want it to mean to your family, you may find that we can help.
Our kind and caring team has created a guide where we compare funeral plans at your convenience so that you can understand your options. They have also put together a range of *pre-paid funeral plans that may make it easier for you to express your wishes while also lightening the load on your next of kin and fellow loved ones when they find themselves needing to mourn.
Regardless of how you may wish to proceed, we want to let you know that we are always here for you and that all you have to do is ask. Given everything you are going through right now, we feel it is the least we can do when you want to be able to pay your respects in a way that feels right.
*Terms and conditions apply. You will receive a funeral plan summary before purchase to help you make an informed decision.
If you have any questions, would like a brochure or simply would like a chat through our services, our award-winning team is here to help.
Unlike other providers, we won’t hassle you with constant calls. We’ll simply ensure you have the information you need and leave you to come to a decision in your own time. When you’re ready for us, our team will be ready to help.
While our guide has made a number of suggestions, the most important thing is to find a choice that you feel happy with on every level. If you find a verse that resonates in terms of warmth, sincerity, and the compassion of the words, you will know that you have found a fitting poetic tribute to your friend.
“She Is Gone” by David Harkins is a moving composition that many people find strikes the right note when they are looking for an uplifting service. This type of approach is particularly well-suited to occasions where you want to celebrate the life someone led, as opposed to mourning the fact that they have died.
At just 16 lines long, “Crossing the Bar” by Lord Tennyson remains one of the most timeless, enduring short poems that describe friendship. Reading an excerpt or the poem in its entirety may serve as a fitting tribute to your friend at a time when you may understandably feel that you miss them more than ever.
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